Traci was watching that Regis & Kelly show and said that John Heffron was the subject of their daily “Travel Trivia question. The lucky caller correctly identified (with a guess!) that Detroit was Heffron’s hometown, as stated by him on the previous day’s show. The caller won a trip to Hawaii and $3,000 worth of appliances. Who, among the L.C.S.ers is making the biggest impression out there in Cyber-America? Well, it ain’t scientific, but a cursory examination of our top ten “search keyphrases” (it’s one of the many stats we have access to here at SHECKYmagazine.com) reveals the following:

bonnie mcfarlane
gary gulman
mitch hedberg
lewis black
dick cavett
shecky magazine
shecky
alonzo bodden
last comic standing
kathleen madigan

We’d like to remind all you SHECKYmagazine.com readers that the poll is still up and collecting data. We wanna know how long you’ve been doing comedy. The poll’s over there —–> and, even if you have never set foot on a stage, you can still check the top answer (“Never Done It”).

DISSED BY THE DEAF!

Some of you may recall that we were anticipating doing a Saturday late show at the Sands Regency for the hearing impaired people who were staying at the hotel. Comic and club manager James Bean even arranged for a signer (that’s sign-er, as in “one who signs, not sing-er, as in “one who sings”) to interpret our acts for the folks who can’t hear. Well, not one deaf person showed up (Again we ask, is “deaf” regarded as a pejorative term among the HI crowd?) and we even got stood up by the signer! No matter, though– we had a healthy and appreciative crowd of non-HI fans show up. Would have been quite a challenge, though! We were really looking forward to it. And Cris Clobber, who was performing over at the Silver Legacy, gave us some good pointers, should we ever actually perform for the HI.

“No, not tonight, thank you…”

Can a person be too polite? This is the question we are asking today. Last night, at 12:44 AM, the phone here in our room at the Sahara rang. Who the…? Brian answered. Traci heard Brian say, “No, not tonight, thank you…” before hanging up. She thought it might be housekeeping… but at 12:44 AM? Turns out it was “Vanessa,” asking if Brian “would like a woman sent to the room?” Upon learning the true nature of the caller, Traci would have preferred an answer more along the lines of “I most certainly do not want some trollop sent up to my room! Filthy whore! I and my lovely wife are appalled at your offer! Good day!” After receiving a message this morning from “Summer” making pretty much the same offer, we concluded that hookers are in season here in Vegas. Perhaps it’s the Associated Surplus Dealers/Associated Merchandise Dealers convention that’s dominating the town this week (and driving up hotel room rates!) that’s responsible for the increaased hooker chatter. You know those retailers…