Last Comic Standing: June 5 episode

by Brian McKim & Traci Skene on June 6th, 2008

Shashi Batia (we won’t waste the bold code on her name) was the audition from Hell or whatever they’ve been calling it. It wasn’t worth the wait.

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Francois Fly? We’ll repeat it, the Mel Silverback thang ain’t gonna happen again!

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“The San Francisco scene is a mixed bag,” says Stewart French… or French Stewart. He said it with a raised eyebrow (we could hear it). NO. No, it is not. Not in the way he implied. It only appears that way because the producers of the show scoured the earth for nitwits and put them up in front of you while the cameras rolled.

It’s not a mixed bag that has a disproportionate concentration of goofballs and weirdos populating the comedy clubs. Nor is it the sinkhole of talent that this show is leading viewers to believe. (They did the same thing to Los Angeles last week and they’re doing it this week to S.F.)

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“From the pretenders to the contenders,” says the voiceover, as we make the transition from the psychos to the alleged pros. The first “contenders” are the Meehan Brothers. It was 1977 high school variety show funny. The scouts nailed it when they said the brothers were reminsicent of street performers. Precisely. Not that there’s anything wrong with street performers– A. Whitney Brown started out as one– But we don’t see a whole lot of the Comedy Eye of the Tiger among street performers by and large. (It’s the nature of the beast– the “edgy” or “caustic” street performer is swiftly hurried off the corner by the police after several complaints are lodged.)

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We recall doing “yuppie” jokes back in 1984 or so. We also recall stopping with the “yuppie” jokes about 1985 or so. Here we are, 23 years later and we have Sky and Nancy Collins. It wasn’t funny in 1986 and it’s not all that startling or humorous now.

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Stewart French and Josh Gomez might be the most entertaining of the scout teams so far.

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They haven’t videotaped enough that they have to show Jeff Dye doing the Costco joke TWICE?!?!

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ALL RIGHT! Sheyla Almeida is shown yet again! More hits for SHECKYMagazine.com! (You wouldn’t believe the number of times this is showing up in our stats)

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=last+comic+standing+big+tits

She was #9 in the Worst Audition Countdown.

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(Before we forget: We saw FOS Paul Ogata in the quick-cut montage at the beginning of tonight’s broadcast.)

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Jonathan Thymius made quite an impact– both in the afternoon and in the evening’s showcase. He’s the brains behind HollywoodComediansRadio.com, a podcast that interviews comedians.

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Nearly halfway through the show, we are consumed by the (irrational?) fear that viewers are of the opinion that this– borderline psychotics, fake boxers, strippers with no discernible talent other than to shake “it” and a man who punches himself, etc.– is what passes for entertainment at your local comedy club. And that they’ll dismiss the idea of going to a comedy club altogether. Or they’ll be sorely disappointed when the acts onstage don’t punch themselves or fake weeping or threaten folks in the room and make them feel uncomfortable. Which is worse?

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We reported on March 1 that the following made it through:

showcase:
Mike E. Winfield
Andy Haynes
Iliza Shlesinger
Jeff Dye
Drennon Davis
Whitney Cummings
Meehan Brothers

It looks like the Red Envelope was snatched back from Andy Haynes and Whitney Cummings.

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On to Toronto!

And we can’t look at Dave Foley without thinking about the time that The Female Half and Foley got into a screaming match with the Kid in the Hall at a bar in Hollywood called the Coach and Four. (It’s a long story, but it ended just about at last call with a handful or two of straggling patrons looking on and the ceiling lights blinking and the music cutting off just as Foley stands and bellows how many “American dawlers” he paid in taxes the year before.)

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We can’t escape the idea that the folks in the Funny Booth look like they’re on the toilet (as so many of the “contestants” have alluded to). The Female Half points out that most comics are probably more funny when actually on the toilet. (Although, we have no way of knowing, thank the good lord.) The Funny Booth is rare among innovations– it is neither innovative nor entertaining. It invariably results in squirming, looking away from the screen, bathroom breaks and trips to the refrigerator when you’re not even hungry.

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Why do all the obvious amateurs think that nakedness is their ticket to the big time?
On what planet, in what subculture, in what alternate universe is the exposure of more flesh than just the face and arms automatically an invitation to hilarity? Why are we seeing so many paunchy men wearing speedos? Why are so many contestants shirtless? And why are they all males? (There are notable exceptions– sometimes nekkid does lead to laughter. Witness our wildly popular short film, “Starting Over” here. We like to think that the nakedity is secondary to the jocularity.)

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How ill-suited is Fearne Cotton for this job? When one of the contestants told her that he had just written one of his jokes five minutes before he performed it, she… didn’t ask him which one! We here at home were stunned! Which one?!?! Which one?!?

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Keep this in mind when watching the show:

TV Guide: What’s the best line you’ve heard so far?

Bellamy: I like, “What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t matter– he ain’t coming!” [Laughs] I was dying!

It was Derek Forgie who told it. But he didn’t tell seriously– he told it in the character of a Catskills/burlesque comic. (We must ask, Exactly where has Bellamy been all his life? Raised in Madagascar, perhaps? Although, we suspect that young Madagascarians had a variation on the joke involving lemurs with no legs. So Bellamy has absolutely no excuse.)

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We reported back on February 16 that Sean Cullen, Winston Spear, The Williamson Playboys and Brian Lazanik were given red envelopes.

Add Brian Lazanik and The Williamson Playboys to the “burned” list!

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We’re pleased to hear that Richard Kind stressed on at least two occasions, via voiceover, that he was amazed at just how difficult standup comedy is. The man seems to have tremendous respect for us standup comics. We wonder if Collette Hawley had anything to do with that?

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