That might be our favorite line from Justin Hegerman‘s appearance on Philadelphia NBC-10’s 10! morning show. Watch the excruciating (and mercifully short) video of his set. He won a contest conducted by local morning radio show host John DeBella and the prize was… this: We must commend host Bill Henley and his co-host (whose name we do not know) for treatign Hegerman with respect and pretty much acknowledging the debacle but minimizing it– in a way they were admitting that the producers screwed up badly by either not approving the material beforehand and making some sort of switch or demanding different material or delaying the appearance.

Hegerman deserves props for plowing through the set. He’s obviously not very experienced, so he dealt with the whole mess with surprising aplomb. (You gotta figure that he wondered if this appearance– on a local television outlet, with only a local viewership– would tank HIS CAREER. Of course, it’s merely a speed bump… a bizarre incident that yields nothing more than a great story to tell– and a great, possibly viral video– and a real “That which does not kill me makes me stronger” experience.) And, of course, he no doubt got some people to come out and see him at Helium that weekend!

We’re reminded of two incidents. The Female Half went on a sixth-grade class trip to the WPVI studios in Philadelphia to witness a broadcast of AM Philadelphia. One of the guests that day was Pincus Leff AKA Pinky Lee. (According to Wikipedia, Leff was “better known as Pinky Lee… an American burlesque comic and host of a children’s television program, The Pinky Lee Show, in the early 1950s.”

Of course, by this time, Lee had been off television for a decade, so the booking was ill-advised. The reaction to Lee’s plaid-clad shtick was less than receptive. (“The kids were fidgety and dismissive,” says the Female Half. “The first thing he did when he sat down to do panel was to complain about having to perform in front of a bunch of kids.” Lee no doubt had hoped that there would have been a studio full of his older fans in the stands.)

The other incident involves The Male Half appearing on KYW-TV’s People Are Talking, then hosted by Maury Povich. A call had gone out through the local comedy community about 48 hours earlier that the producers were seeking local comedians to do two minutes of material to supplement a segment starring Alan King, then on the show to pump a recent project. The Male Half answered the call, did his time, got a half-decent response and stood still while King graciously offered a mini-critique of the set. (It’s still in the press material somewhere– Alan King describes the Male Half as “an egghead comic.”)

So… is anyone here scared of dying? If so, decline the offer from the local television morning show producers. If you’re not scared, set the clock for 4:45 AM, get out your notes, monitor the traffic, get there in plenty of time and prepare for anything. Even dying.