Not sure.

But check out all these ghoulish Hollywood types trying to revive the corpse.

We’re particularly routing for the “The TBS Comedy Road Show.” (It’s EP’ed by Page Hurwitz, who last plied her talents on Last Comic Standing.

We love the description:

half-hour series which aims to put a contemporary spin on vaudeville, a genre of a variety entertainment prevalent in the early 20th century

We especially like the fact that (someone) feels that it’s necessary to explain just what vaudeville is! If you gotta explain the cultural phenomenon that your project is based on, why not just leave out the comparison?

Both Halves of the Staff will be tweeting (via Twitter!) during Sunday night’s Academy Awards broadcast. They’ll be among the “thirty great comedians” that have been wrangled by Comedy.com for the occasion. To follow along and read the torrent of tweets, just go to WatchWithComics, a special Twitter page set up by Comedy.com that will offer a steady stream of real time snark as comedians tweet while watching your favorite shows!

Click on the above link and click on the “Join today!” button (if you haven’t already been Twitter-fied). If you’re already signed up with a Twitter account, just hit the “Follow” button underneath Oscar!

It should be pretty interesting… and quite possibly hysterical!

It reminds us of something that Wayne Cotter did when he had a graveyard shift at the University of Penn’s radio station WXPN, but with a hi-tech twist. Cotter says he would tune the studio’s black-and-white television to whatever dismal b-movie or horror flick was on at the time and invite listeners to follow along at home while he provided real-time snark. I believe he also said that callers were invited to phone in and have a bit of conversation about the pic as well. Everything old is new again.

Among the comedians are Craig Shoemaker, Rob Little, Orny Adams, Al Madrigal, Mark Eddie, J. Chris Newberg, Graham Elwood, Jamie Kaler, Eric Schwartz, Ben Gleib and Bert Kreischer.

On the occasion of the upcoming release of Judd Apatow‘s movie about standup comics, we wanted to drive people to The Male Half’s review of that sorry-ass abomination starring Tom Hanks and Sally Fields as comedians.

Doctors, soldiers, cowboys, are frequently portrayed in Panavision. Comics are relegated to some asshole that Annie Romano’s dating on “One Day At A Time.” Finally, the sprawling story would be told via cinema! No such luck. We were, to a man, horrified. It was a scandal among all in the standup comedy business.

They say you never realize how inaccurate the newspapers are until they report on something that you have personal knowledge of. The same is true of Hollywood. When those boys make a film about your profession, or your milieu, or your mother, it can take years for the cliches and the bad info to fade away…if they ever do. The ill effects of “Punchline” are still felt. When I watched it the other night, it all came flooding back to me.

I remember that an awful lot of comics saw it on the first day of release, at the afternoon matinee. (One tired cliche happened to be true at that time: an awful lot of us had nothing to do during the day!) There we were, slumped in our theater chairs in Syracuse and Saginaw and Lauderdale, mouths agape at this two-hour assault on our dream job.

Maltin was calling writer/director David Seltzer’s script “compassionate and believable” and said that it managed “to avoid cliches and easy answers.” We were telling anyone who would listen that it was total horseshit.

He’s just getting warmed up. We still call it The Definitive Smackdown Of Punchline.

From the Wikipedia entry for the film, comes this recipe for a craptastic Hollywood abomination:

David Seltzer wrote the first draft for Punchline in 1979 after becoming fascinated by comedy clubs while looking for someone to play a psychiatrist on a television pilot that he was writing.[1] He had a development deal with the movie division of ABC. Originally, the tone of the film was more good-natured a la Fame (1980) with more characters and less of an emphasis on Steven Gold.[1] Bob Bookman, an executive, sponsored the script but left for Columbia Pictures. He bought the screenplay because Howard Zieff was interested in directing it. When Zieff lost interest (he ended up doing Unfaithfully Yours in 1984), the script was buried for years.[2]

In 1986, producer Daniel Melnick found the screenplay for Punchline among twelve other scripts collecting dust in the vaults of Columbia Pictures.[2] Seltzer’s screenplay had gone through three changes of studio management because the executives didn’t like the mix of comedy and drama. They also didn’t like the Steven Gold character because they thought he was, according to Melnick, “obsessive, certainly self-destructive and could be considered mean-spirited.”[2] The studio couldn’t get a major star to commit to the material and so Melnick decided to make the movie for $8 million and with no stars.[2] Interim studio president, Steve Sohmer didn’t like that idea and sent the script to Sally Field, who had a production deal with Columbia. Field agreed to star in and produce the movie.[2] Once Field signed on, the budget was set at $15 million.

Field didn’t mind sharing the majority of the screen time with Hanks and taking on the role of producer because, as she said in an interview at the time, “as a producer I am not developing films in which I can do fancy footwork. I don’t have to have the tour de force part.”[2] New York comic, Susie Essman and sitcom writer Dottie Archibald coached Field.[3] The writer also served as comedy consultant for the movie, recruiting fifteen comics to populate the comedy club Steven and Lilah frequent.[3] Field’s research often mirrored her character’s as she remembers working “for about six months to find where Lilah’s comedy was, which is what my character was going through. So it was actually happening to both of us.”[4]

Two months before the Punchline went into production, Tom Hanks wrote a five-minute stand-up act and performed it at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles. As Hanks recalls, “it was pure flop sweat time, an embarrassment. That material lasted 1 minute 40 seconds, and it had no theme.”[2] Hanks tried again and again, sometimes hitting three clubs a night. It took a month before the actor “didn’t sweat like a pig” on stage.[2] By that point he had enlisted an old friend and comedy writer, Randy Fechter and stand-up comic Barry Sobel to help him write his routine.[5] Hanks ended up performing more than thirty times in clubs in Los Angeles and New York City.

Chairman of Columbia, David Puttnam wanted to release Punchline during the Christmas of 1987, but the film wasn’t ready.[2] Puttnam eventually left and Dawn Steel moved in and decided to release the movie after Big (1988) became a huge hit. Punchline grossed a respectable $21 million in the United States.

Seems as though Youtube is taking down a lot of clips lately, at the behest of large music companies like BMG or WMG or UMG. They’re employing a bit of software that identifies a song’s “fingerprint” and then alerts the company that owns the copyright to the song and then it takes the video clip down. If you notice a clip of yours missing, click on your “Account” button and there’ll be a brief explanation of why it was taken removed.

We just had this happen to us. Our “A Man And A Woman” video was up to 15,000 views when it just disappeared. The Female Half investigated and eventually got to the bottom of it: The music, “A Man And A Woman,” from the Academy Award-winning (Best Foreign Language Film, 1966) movie of the same name, was identified by Youtube’s software and the Warner Music Group, looking out for the interests of composer Frances Lai, had Youtube take it down.

Here’s the interesting part: You can dispute the take-down.

It’s a simple process and, following simple directions from the video below (also on Youtube!), you can dispute it, claim Fair Use and also state that you are disputing the claim in good faith.

The guy who made the video claims that it works 99 per cent of the time.

He also says that if, after disputing the take-down and (possibly) having your video restored, the company that owns the copyright tacks a small advert onto your video that tells folks where and how they can purchase a copy of the song in the video.

Sounds like a sensible way to make everybody happy. (In fact, when we were in the outraged, sputtering and grousing phase– just after we discovered our clip had been obliterated– we suggested that the conglomerates were being rather unreasonable and, by golly, what would be so wrong with letting folks use their music as long as they drove people to Amazon or Itunes! Turns out that’s exactly what they’re doing!) Could Big Music finally be figuring out how to deal with new technology? Maybe. Might it be too little too late? Probably. We’ll see.

Will the dispute work? We’ll see. Judging from the wording of the Copyright Act of 1976, the use of the song constitutes Fair Use. At least we think it does. (Otherwise, we wouldn’t have dared to claim that we were making the claim in good faith.) We hear it takes a while for resolution. We’ll keep you posted.

UPDATE: Minutes after filing our resolution application, the “A.M.A.A.W.” video is BACK! And there doesn’t seem to be any sort of link to a site where the music can be purchased. Hmmm… a mystery. But we’re glad it’s back! (It’s at 15,213 views and still going strong!)

The Male Half makes a brief appearance. He taped it between shows at the Comedy & Magic Club. There are a ton of other comics in it… too numerous to mention.

Did we say too numerous to mention? How silly of us.

Put your hand over the list of comics and try to identify all of them. Surely someone can turn it into a drinking game!

Brooke Long, J Chris Newberg, Rob Little, Adam Hammer, Raylene Bartolacci, Nick Thune, The Crowd at The Improv, Nikki Todd, Jo Koy, Brian McKim, Chris Porter, Nikki Glaser, Kat La Ronde, Lisa Gershuny, Jill Allen, Lexi Baxter, Bethany Anderson, Chuck Ojeda, Sarah Tiana, Dave Mishevitz, Kivi Rogers, Greg Otto, Mark eddie, The Hells Bells, Natasha Vogt, Jaime Rutt, Tim Mars, Angelo Bowers, Jen Murphy, Josh Meyers, eddie Pence, Jenn Cole, AJ, Regan, Regan Alvord, Jeff Dye, Adam Devine, Dave Donaldson, Katy Hall, Kat Kaplan, Flower The Dog, Stephen Glickman, Laura Valdivia, Sara Giller, Jeff Klinger, Kira Soltanovich, Ryan Hoffman, Michael Kosta, Carly Hal lum, Gary Cannon, Jenny Huish, Alicia Wood, Dee Burdett, Ben Gleib, Flip Schultz, Whitney Cummings, Daryl Wright,=2 0Jessie Schneiderman, Mark Frye, Suzy McCoppin, Ron Swallow, Sam Tripoli, Sugen, Sarah Dandashy, Rebecca Norris, Joe Spina, Abbey Sibucao, Jade Cata Prada, Dan Bialek, Chris Koviks, Brett Ernst.

We’ve been trying all day to figure how who the vocals and the music is/are reminiscent of… is it Weezer? Weezer on the good albums, to be sure.

In the ten years we’ve published this magazine, we’ve rarely used this platform to air any personal grievances. It was never our intention to use it for that.

But once in a great while, we’re moved to relate a personal experience because we feel that it might serve as a cautionary tale. We hope that people might learn from our experience.

We were booked to perform in Reading, PA, on March 20-21, at the Reading Comedy Outlet. In purely logistical terms, it’s a sweet gig– 70 miles from home, back in our own bed by late Saturday night/early Sunday morning, and (from what we recall of the last time we were there almost ten years ago), decent, appreciative crowds.

On Sunday morning, when The Female Half was corresponding with a friend (who happened to be performing at that very venue this past weekend), the friend mentioned that she was invited back to the club to open for Ben Bailey in March. Bailey had just canceled his scheduled Feb. 27-28 engagement at the club and he was immediately re-scheduled… for a date in March.

Since we had our own date in March, we momentarily feared that it was our weekend that Bailey had been re-scheduled to. But, since we hadn’t heard anything from Reading, we assumed it was on another weekend.

We assumed wrong.

By Sunday afternoon, we confirmed from our friend that Bailey had indeed been re-scheduled… to March 20-21. Our date.

Rather than wait for a phone call, we called the Reading Comedy Outlet proprietor Todd Hiester to find out what the situation was. (We left a pleasant, businesslike voicemail on Heister’s phone on Sunday evening, asking what the deal was and inquiring as to whether there would be any compensation in the event that we were, in fact, canceled.)

While we were taxiing to the gate in PHL this morning, we checked our V.M. and were treated to a message from Hiester, explaining that we were indeed canceled. But we were assured that we had “plenty of time” to re-book the date at another club and that there’s “no loss,” to us, and, as such, there would be no compensation. And, as he was willing to re-book us at the club at some unspecified time in the future, things were all better.

We got home and sent an email and expressed our disappointment that we were canceled with so little advance, and that we were not informed of the cancellation sooner. And we were particularly annoyed that there would be no attempt to make good on the booking, other than some vague promise of a re-booking in the future.

We also expressed our shock that The Female Half wasn’t at the very least offered the feature spot. (Not that she would have taken it, but we were appalled that the offer wasn’t made.) We said that the entire affair could have been “handled a whole lot better.”

The email we got back was not satisfactory. We’ll summarize:

“These things happen, as you well know.”

“The time to book something else is very doable.”

You are taking this personally.

Wow. Oh, sure, it was sweetened with an “I’m sorry” here and there, but the underlying message was “too bad.”

There’s a colloquialism (which was popularized by NYPD Blue‘s Det. Andy Sipowicz)– “Don’t piss on my shoes and tell me it’s raining.” In this case, we would have appreciated it if, as he was pissing on our shoes, he would have made at least a half-hearted attempt at trying to convince us it was raining. No such attempt was made.

Instead, we were told to get over it, suck it up and move on.

Normally, we’d write a “Fuck you” letter and leave it at that, but we still felt that Hiester just didn’t get it. So we spelled it out.

You seem confused.

We were canceled because Ben Bailey rescheduled?

It doesn’t really matter why we were canceled. We were canceled. Period.

It’s not personal at all. We don’t maintain that you’re a bad person. We maintain that you’re an inadequate businessperson.

We’ve had people cancel out on us, but they offer us a date. Note the difference: They offer us a specific date and they don’t just say, “I’ll offer you another date,” and leave it at that. And, since the only weekend we’ve ever booked with you was canceled with five weeks notice, we have to wonder why we would accept the offer of another date as adequate compensation for what was done.

Such a vague offer does nothing to placate us (and, since we’re the aggrieved party here, a bit of placating is in order).

Others offer the specific date and they also offer us more money for our trouble– which is what re-booking a date already on the books is– It’s an inconvenience to have to re-book a date. And, yes, there is loss there, as time is not infinite. We’ve had people compensate us 100 per cent– effectively pay us to stay home!– because they crunched the numbers and found it better to pay us off (thereby avoiding alienating us and destroying the business relationship) in order to follow through on whatever plan they had.

We’ve also had situations where one of us was kept on the bill and an arrangement was made for a rebooking of both acts later.

Offering another, specific date and then offering more money on top of the deal might demonstrate that you are interested in keeping some sort of relationship with us. It would be a good faith effort to make up for the short-notice cancellation. (Instead, we’re told that we’re not in any position to complain, that we’re not losing anything and that we’re taking it all too personally.)

Your greed is the only reason that you think you “have no control over the reschedule date for Ben.” If you had any loyalty or any business sense, you’d politely refuse to book Ben until an open date is on the calendar or you would book him into the March 20/21 date and compensate us somehow. Of course, it’s a good thing to bring in 10 or 15 grand into the club (and probably get press on top of it)– what club wouldn’t want to do that? But to do so while treating us in such a crass manner says that you have tremendous regard for comedians only when they’re capable of generating such revenue. And that those who don’t are interchangeable and their troubles are not worthy of your time and consideration.

You didn’t even inquire as to whether we were available for the Feb. 27-28 date. Of course, we’re not– we’re booked elsewhere– but we were not given a chance to refuse the date.

So you had ample opportunity to avoid alienating us–

You could have immediately offered us a date in the future (a real date, not a theoretical one)

You could have offered us a date (and thrown in more money for our trouble)

You could have offered us the date that Ben Bailey vacated.

You could have offered the feature spot on what was previously our weekend (with an offer for a future date)

You could have taken some of the profits from the Ben Bailey weekend and paid us off for anywhere from 50 per cent to 100 per cent of what we would have made.

You could have inquired (after explaining your predicament) as to whether we would be willing to take the same money but drop down to Feature and Emcee on the Ben Bailey shows. A win-win-win (if we were to accept the arrangement), as it would have gotten you not one, not two, but three quality headliners on the bill for the premium $18 ticket price– for not much more money than you are going to spend anyway. (And, it’s an arrangement that we might actually have agreed to if you had asked, as there is precious little chance that we’re going to be able to re-book the date with only five weeks to go.)

Instead, you delay telling us about the cancellation (we should have been the first people you called), you tell us that we have plenty of time to re-book the date and you clearly say on the voicemail that you are too busy to take a phone call on the matter because you’re cleaning up the mess made by the Ben Bailey cancellation. (And in your follow-up emails and voicemail, you manage to insult us, express your annoyance and tell us that we’re “taking it personally.”

And you offer us some vague date in the future (which you are too busy to actually nail down right now because you’re so busy trying to recover some or all of the $10,000 in revenue from the cancelled tickets). And, I really don’t want to hear about how much of a guarantee Ben Bailey is commanding– he’s obviously going to turn you a nice profit if you’re willing to anger two professional comedians (with 50+ years combined experience) living within 75 miles of your club. So unnecessary.

And pretty sorry. Especially considering what little it would have taken to make us happy.

We have yet to hear a response. We don’t expect to get one.

In these times of economic uncertainty, it’s rather disconcerting to be told that the cancellation of a date with five weeks is “no loss,” and that re-booking the date with some other venue in some other location with just five weeks notice is no problem.

The takeaway: It might not be a good idea to count on a booking from someone who regards a short-notice cancellation as no loss, and who is so cavalier about a professional comedian losing out on income. (We point out that the date in question was booked months ago. What makes that same booker think that a similar date can materialize in a fraction of that time?)

After a bit of back and forth with Hiester, we found ourselves in the position of actually spelling out for him exactly how he might have handled the situation better. Should we really have to be doing that?

There are people in this business who get it. In fact, we’ve posted about three of them within the past week. And then, there are the Todd Hiesters of the world.

We were booked to perform in Reading, PA, on March 20-21, at the Reading Comedy Outlet. In purely logistical terms, it’s a sweet gig– 70 miles from home, back in our own bed by late Saturday night/early Sunday morning, and, from what we recall, decent, appreciative crowds.

On Saturday night, when The Female Half was corresponding with a friend who happened to be performing at that very venue this past weekend, the friend mentioned that she was invited back to the club to open for Ben Bailey in March. Bailey had just canceled his scheduled Feb. 27-28 at the club and he was immediately re-scheduled… for a date in March.

Since we had our own date in March, we momentarily feared that it was our weekend that Bailey had be re-scheduled to. But, since we hadn’t heard anything from Reading, we assumed it was on another weekend.

We assumed wrong.

By Sunday afternoon, we learned that Bailey had indeed been re-scheduled to March 20-21. Our date.

Rather than wait for a phone call, we called the Reading Comedy Outlet proprietor Todd Heister to find out what the situation was. (We left a pleasant voicemail
on Heister’s phone on Sunday evening, asking what the deal was and inquiring as to whether there would be any compensation in the event that we were canceled.

While we were taxiing to the gate in PHL this morning, we checked our V.M. and were treated to a message from Heister, explaining that we were in fact canceled. But we were assured that we had “plenty of time” to re-book the date and that there’s “no loss,” to us, as he was willing to re-book us at the club at some unspecified time in the future.

We got home and sent an email and expressed our disappointment that we were canceled with so little advance, that we were not informed sooner and that there would be not attempt to make good on the booking– i.e. compensation for the lost income. We also expressed our shock that we weren’t at least offered the feature spot. (Not that either one of us would have taken it, but we were appalled that the offer wasn’t made.)

The email we got back was not satisfactory– a lot of nonsense about .

You seem confused.

We were canceled because Ben Bailey rescheduled?

It doesn’t really matter why we were canceled. We were canceled. Period.

It’s not personal at all. We don’t maintain that you’re a bad person. We maintain that you’re an inadequate businessperson.

We’ve had people cancel out on us, but they offer us a date. Note the difference: They offer us a specific date and they don’t just say, “I’ll offer you another date,” and leave it at that. And, since the only weekend we’ve ever booked with you was canceled with five weeks notice, we have to wonder why we would accept the offer of another date as adequate compensation for what was done.

Such a vague offer does nothing to placate us (and, since we’re the aggrieved party here, a bit of placating is in order).

Others offer the specific date and they also offer us more money for our trouble– which is what re-booking a date already on the books is– It’s an inconvenience to have to re-book a date. And, yes, there is loss there, as time is not infinite. We’ve had people compensate us 100 per cent– effectively pay us to stay home!– because they crunched the numbers and found it better to pay us off (thereby avoiding alienating us and destroying the business relationship) in order to follow through on whatever plan they had.

We’ve also had situations where one of us was kept on the bill and an arrangement was made for a rebooking of both acts later.

Offering another, specific date and then offering more money on top of the deal might demonstrate that you are interested in keeping some sort of relationship with us. It would be a good faith effort to make up for the short-notice cancellation. (Instead, we’re told that we’re not in any position to complain, that we’re not losing anything and that we’re taking it all too personally.)

Your greed is the only reason that you think you “have no control over the reschedule date for Ben.” If you had any loyalty or any business sense, you’d politely refuse to book Ben until an open date is on the calendar or you would book him into the March 20/21 date and compensate us somehow. Of course, it’s a good thing to bring in 10 or 15 grand into the club (and probably get press on top of it)– what club wouldn’t want to do that? But to do so while treating us in such a crass manner says that you have tremendous regard for comedians only when they’re capable of generating such revenue. And that those who don’t are interchangeable and their troubles are not worthy of your time and consideration.

You didn’t even inquire as to whether we were available for the Feb. 27-28 date. Of course, we’re not– we’re booked elsewhere– but we were not given a chance to refuse the date.

So you had ample opportunity to avoid alienating us–

You could have immediately offered us a date in the future (a real date, not a theoretical one)

You could have offered us a date (and thrown in more money for our trouble)

You could have offered us the date that Ben Bailey vacated.

You could have offered the feature spot on what was previously our weekend (with an offer for a future date)

You could have taken some of the profits from the Ben Bailey weekend and paid us off for anywhere from 50 per cent to 100 per cent of what we would have made.

You could have inquired (after explaining your predicament) as to whether we would be willing to take the same money but drop down to Feature and Emcee on the Ben Bailey shows. A win-win-win (if we were to accept the arrangement), as it would have gotten you not one, not two, but three quality headliners on the bill for the premium $18 ticket price– for not much more money than you are going to spend anyway. (And, it’s an arrangement that we might actually have agreed to if you had asked, as there is precious little chance that we’re going to be able to re-book the date with only five weeks to go.)

Instead, you delay telling us about the cancellation (we should have been the first people you called), you tell us that we have plenty of time to re-book the date and you clearly say on the voicemail that you are too busy to take a phone call on the matter because you’re cleaning up the mess made by the Ben Bailey cancellation. (And in your follow-up emails and voicemail, you manage to insult us, express your annoyance and tell us that we’re “taking it personally.”

And you offer us some vague date in the future (which you are too busy to actually nail down right now because you’re so busy trying to recover some or all of the $10,000 in revenue from the cancelled tickets). And, I really don’t want to hear about how much of a guarantee Ben Bailey is commanding– he’s obviously going to turn you a nice profit if you’re willing to anger two professional comedians (with 50+ years combined experience) living within 75 miles of your club. So unnecessary.

And pretty sorry. Especially considering what little it would have taken to make us happy.

We returned to the Joke Joint in Minneapolis (technically, Bloomington, MN) this past weekend to perform at the Joke Joint and we must say that proprietor Ken Reed has made some tremendous changes since the last time we were there 11 months ago.

It’s in the Ramada Mall of America (the Native American decor at that hotel is a spectacle to behold!), and recently, Reed persuaded the hotel management to move the performance space into a larger, adjacent rectangular space sunken three or four steps below the old space– and the difference is amazing. (Hotel management refers to the area as “Lower Totem!”)

We’ve had a great time at the club in the past, but this weekend was a joy– packed houses (Valentine’s Weekend Special Appearance By The Married Couple! See MLPS City Pages hit here.)– and the new stage, seating and lighting makes for a carefree standup experience for audience and comics alike. The crowds were thrilled. (There’s something about moving folks from a funky, irregularly-shaped, makeshift room into a box with perfect dimensions– it’s transformative and it makes the shows improve in ways that are hard to quantify.)

And the indigenous Minneapolis/Minnesota/regional acts are many and varied and dedicated. Reed takes great care in providing a friendly zone for the comics that are up-and-coming. And the Joint is also hospitable to comics that are established. The Sunday open mike was well-attended and the acts ranged from newbies to established features to established headliners.

Of course, it’s also a blast to wade into a market that has a higher-than-average SHECKYmagazine readership– we marinated in the SHECKY fandom (it doesn’t take all that much)– and we also sat in on the Sunday afternoon workshop.

The Male Half poses with visiting pro Isaac Witty (newly re-located to Los Angeles and in the Twin Cities for some private parties) on Sunday afternoon at the Joke Joint.
(Photo Credit: Ken Reed)

Check out the article in Crain’s Detroit Business by Julie Yolles marking the 30th anniversary of Mark Ridley as a comedy entrepreneur in the Detroit area.

“Mike Binder told me that I invented the three-comic format,” Ridley said. “He also gave me the idea of bringing in comics from out of state that whole first year, which really opened the doors for me in L.A. and New York.”

The successful three-comic format, which Ridley still uses, is a 15-minute time slot for the opening emcee, 20 minutes for the middle act, and the headliner fills the remaining time in the 90-minute show.

When Ridley opened the Comedy Castle, he estimates that it was only the fifth or sixth comedy club in the country.

(There follows a quote from SHECKYmagazine– an estimate on how many comedy clubs currently do business in America. We also heaped praise on Ridley, but the quotes never made it into the article. We suspect our testimony was dumped in favor of quotes from former hometown boy Dave Coulier.)

We worked at the Comedy Castle for the first time last winter. It is an exceptionally well-run room with delightful crowds. (And, of course, it all comes down from the top– Mark Ridley knows that happy comics make happy crowds, which, in turn, makes happy comics. It’s a simple, non-vicious cycle that Ridley is adept at perpetuating.)

We wonder if Google is paying Jay Ward Productions any royalties for use of the term “Wayback Machine?” (We’re not trying to start a fight here, just making the connection between the internet search giant’s handy archive searcher and the old cartoon starring the bespectacle boy genius and his bespectacled pooch.)

Editors note: An astute reader points out that the Wayback Machine is not owned by Google. (See comments) Also: Here is a link to the Machine itself.

Not everyone is aware of the existence of the Wayback Machine. We stumbled upon it a few years ago, just after a worm wiped out many of the SHECKYmagazine files back in August of 2003. Was it the Blaster or was it Sobig? It doesn’t matter. We had a lot of those files stored locally, so we were able to upload a good portion of the issue that was current and we were able to piece together some of the archives.

But a lot of the files that made up our first 40 months of production still remain “lost.” The Wayback has its shortcomings. If you know the exact name of the file, you can find it and it’ll tell you the date it was uploaded, but not every instance is recorded or stored. (For instance, you can go on and enter the URL for our mag and it returns only 3 files for 1999. Back then, we were uploading a monthly “issue” on the first of every month, so there seems to be a gap or two in the Wayback’s archives.) But you must know the exact name of the file.

We had the pleasure of hanging out with David Feldman last week at the Comedy & Magic Club last week and we remembered that he had consented to do a Question 21 for us in April of 2000. But where was the file? And what was it called?

We eventually recalled that it was named “feldq.htm” and we quickly found it via the Wayback Machine. We then tidied up the HTML a bit and uploaded it to our server so that our readers can enjoy it once again– HERE. (It’s hysterical, as can be expected!)

If we get a spare moment or two over the next few weeks, we might try and rescue some of those old files and interviews and upload a few in time to celebrate our tenth anniversary on April 1!

Jerry Fink interviews Joe Sanfelipo for the Vegas Sun. The Florida-based booker opened a room at the Palace Station… or re-opened it.

That has been a winning formula for Sanfelippo, who now owns a string of 20 or so comedy clubs across the country, with the heaviest concentration in Florida. His latest opened a couple of weeks ago in Las Vegas, in Palace Station. Bonkerz took over the former Laugh Trax showroom, where previous comedy clubs either failed or fell victim to management changes. The L.A. Comedy Club was there for almost a year and is now at Trader Vic’s on the Strip. Gabe Kaplan of Welcome Back Kotter fame had Kaplan’s Laugh Trax there for a few months in 2002.

Sanfelippo plans to market top-notch comedians to locals.

“I’m the kind of guy who looks to fill seats,” he says.[…]

The snobbery part comes in the beginning, when Sanfelipo talks about giving Carrot Top an early leg up. He says that his club “was the first, maybe the second place he had ever performed at in his life.” We found it refreshing that Sanfelipo allows that it may have been the second club! Usually comedy mega-stars have two or three owners scrambling to take credit for being the first (and they’d never let someone else have possible credit).

Vegas is now well positioned to take advantage of an economic resurgence. There may be more comedy rooms there now than there has ever been.

Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman was fuming earlier this week because of a quote from our new president at a stop in Elkhart, IN, to sell the stimulus plan.

We’re going to do something to strengthen the banking system. You are not going to be able to give out these big bonuses until you pay taxpayers back. You can’t get corporate jets. You can’t go take a trip to Las Vegas or go down to the Super Bowl on the taxpayers’ dime. There’s got to be some accountability and some responsibility.

Trips to Vegas (or elsewhere) are an important part of managing a company, an important part of incentivizing employees. It’s not just wild parties and champagne. (Did anyone read the full-page ad that Wells Fargo took out in USA Today on Monday? “Recognition events are still part of our culture. It’s really important that our team members are still valued and recognized.”)

We know of a handful of corporate comics whose bookings are down recently. This meme that parties or gatherings or “recognition events” are wreckless or wasteful is having a real effect on tourism, on casinos, on the hospitality industry– and on comics.

The spectacle of House and Senate members lecturing corporate executives for “wasteful spending” is like something from a bad Paddy Chayefsky script. Talking down spending– as if all spending is merely money thrown into a shredder– is the exact opposite of stimulus.

Two more shows on Saturday, each one putting up 20 comics for five minutes a piece. Basically the same lineup, with some changes– Debi Gutierrez, Gary Cannon, Elon Gold, Chris Porter, T.J. Miller, Jeff Klinger, Mark Eddie and Franklyn Ajaye were onboard on this particular evening.

The 20 Hot Comics format is quite entertaining! There is no emcee– each comic commits the next comic’s intro to memory and brings him on, “tag-team style.” And each comic is limited to five minutes. And to ensure that each act sticks to the time, the AV guy in the back of the house hits a bell (“DING!” like that used at a prize fight) at anywhere from 4:30 to 5:00. (At first, it sounds… barbaric. But we assure you, it’s a hoot! And comics are encouraged to confer with the sound booth beforehand to make sure that the crew is clear on where the ostensible last bit is and is aware of any taglines!) It works exceptionally well. And the audience usually spontaneously erupts into a rousing ovation after each loud ding!

Rob Little, Greg Otto, J. Chris Newberg

It was quite a thrill to meet Ajaye after all these years of correspondence. (We interviewed him back a few years ago– here.)

We’d estimate there were perhaps 30 comics in the house at one point. The atmosphere backstage was like a mini-festival.

Among those present (but not performing) were John McDonnell, Dave Smith, Vinnie Coppola and Kevin Rooney (pictured below with The Male Half).

We hadn’t laid eyes on Rooney since September of 1993! We know the date with certainty, because it coincided with our eventual decision to bug out of L.A. and head back east after living in SoCal for the previous five years. (We hasten to add that Rooney was not our reason for fleeing! But our decision to call U-Haul was made– quite coincidentally– just minutes after that final encounter!)

Lamont Ferguson waiting to go up.

The Comedy & Magic Club was, once again, the perfect host. (We can’t say enough great things about Mike Lacey and Richard Barrett– they do all that is humanly possible to cultivate the ideal atmosphere for both comic and audience member. They arrange things so that the comic need not care about anything other than the performance… and they welcome and situate the audience member so that he need not care about anything other than the performance. What you end up with is a situation where audience and performer harmonically converge. It’s like no other venues in that regard.) We marvel at their humility. When we tell them just how singular the venue is, they react as if what they’r doing and how they’re doing it isn’t extraordinary, nor should it be. (Of course, on the second count, they are absolutely correct. It shouldn’t be extraordinary.)

Just one small anecdote that captures quite nicely the uniqueness of the club: When we arrived at the entrance to the parking lot (it’s on the roof!), we were greeted on this evening (as we had been the previous evening) by a fellow with a clipboard whose task it was to direct the comic to the proper parking spot. He prefaced his greeting with, “I’m sorry, but I don’t remember your name.” Imagine that! (The Female Half says, “Hell, we’ve worked entire weeks at some clubs and, when the owner goes to pay us, isn’t sure of our names!” An exaggeration? Slight, perhaps, but you get the idea.) When the entire outfit is encouraged to familiarize themselves with the names of the acts (and even inclined to apologize when the name isn’t recalled) there is definitely something going on!

It’s been an exhausting four days. We rose Saturday morning and headed over to a quaint breakfast spot in Topanga Canyon to dine with FOS John DiCrosta. DiCrosta ordered eggs benedict– see below!

We call him “Eggs Benedict”

Great house and 20 hot comics (well… 19, but by the end of the show, no one was inclined to count!) and a great evening of standup.

Mike Siegel and Dan Grueter backstage at the Comedy & Magic Club

Steve Mazan
Lamont Ferguson
Dan Grueter
Greg Otto
J. Chris Newberg
David Feldman
Jeff Dye
Gene Pompa
Kivi Rodgers
Isaac Witty
Adam Hammer
David Daniels
Kirk Fox
Mike Siegel
Rob Little
Jim McCue
Edwin San Juan
Phil Perrier
The Male Half
(Not in order of appearance.)

When (outside of an open mike) does an audience get to see 20 comics in a row, in one evening? Bang, bang, bang! One after another– tag team! Hardly a chance to catch the breath, each one just as calm and competent as the next, each one with a unique approach! And in front of an audience that’s as appreciative as any assembled in the country. A great evening of comedy. (And we go back tomorrow for two more shows! Special guests are rumored to be planning to attend. We’ll have pics!)

Steve Mazan and Lamont Ferguson after the show

According to industry rag The Hill (the “industry” in this case is the Federal Government, particularly the Congress of the United States), Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-MN) killed at the Washington Press Club Foundation’s Annual Congressional Dinner on Wednesday night.

I really, really, really have a very simple goal, and that is to keep it as short as Bill Richardson’s tenure as Commerce Secretary.

It actually sounds like jokes. And they’re actually delivered with some skill! (You can tell that she doesn’t expect to get much of a response– she steps on her first half-dozen laughs. There’s a video here.)

It’s a splendid tradition– members of all parties eat and drink and tear each other new assholes! Only in America!

Thanks to FOS Steve Ochs!

The trailer; it’s not safe for work:

We flew into Los Angeles International Airport yesterday afternoon. It was gloomy and drizzly. And it’s more sprawling and confusing than we remember it.

We’re staying just off LAX property. (In fact, when we emerge from the hotel, we can see the giant stainless steel “X” at the airport’s entrance.) On his way to do a set at the Factory in Long Beach, erstwhile SHECKYmagazine columnist Paul Ogata swooped by and picked us up.

When we got there, the show was in full swing and were offered three minutes apiece. (Which we politely declined… are we odd in that we do such things? We were grateful, mind you. We were in no way prepared to perform.)

The club is gorgeous. Cavernous. Circular. Even a balcony upstairs. On this particular evening, the crowd numbered in the mid to high teens. A great crew, though, for being so small in number. (We think it might be the site of the old Long Beach Comedy Club. Which we recall visiting a couple times back in ’93. The neighborhood has been transformed– the gigantic Long Beach Expo Center is across the street and the area has clusters of entertainment and dining establishments. (Someone should create and popularize a portmanteau which takes in dining and entertainment… The Male Half suggests “Culi-tainment” perhaps? The Female Half came up with “Eater-tainment.” Much better.)

We watched Elon Gold do a set, then we watched Ogata’s set, stuck around for a bit of Dean Edwards, then we headed up Pacific Ave. for some Thai food. (There are Thai joints on every other block here in the Southland– something we dearly missed when we left the area for the Northeast.)

Tonight: Hermosa Beach, The Comedy & Magic Club. We’re here through Monday morning.

Doesn’t look good. (By that we mean that it looks like it’s not returning… some folks might interpret “Doesn’t look good” to mean that it is returning, so we must clarify.)

The auditions haven’t been announced on the NBC website. (And if they want to hold auditions in bitterly cold temperatures and freeze an aspiring comic or two, in places like Toronto or New York, they had better step on it!)

The forum on the NBC site (where shut-ins and stalkers and pre-teens get to ruminate on the show) has moved the LCS forum to The Vault, which is the chat-board ghetto that contains all fora dedicated to cancelled shows. (Or shows that are on hiatus… or temporarily suspended… or just not on the schedule at the moment.)

Back in April of last year, we posted that the network was telling advertisers at the upfronts that the show would return on the Summer ’09 schedule. That seems unlikely.

We called the offices of Barry Katz (one of the producers of the show) and the voice on the other end of the line said, “I don’t think it’s continuing,” then “I don’t know… I don’t know.” Then we got switched to the offices of Peter Engel (one of the other producers of the show), and all we heard was a garbled, digitized version of the theme song from Saved By The Bell and an outgoing message asking us to leave a message. Which we did. The moment we hear from them, we’ll let you know.

We took I-10 into Phoenix proper last night, as the folks who run the Wednesday night open mike at Hidden House were gracious enough to allow The Male Half a five-minute spot in preparation for his sets at the Comedy & Magic Club this weekend.

The Male Half has a vicious head cold. The Female Half says his customary deadpan delivery bordered on comatose.

We bugged out shortly after The Male Half’s set was done– the better to recover for this afternoon’s flight to Los Angeles. (And we wanted to check up on The Female Half’s father whose middle finger was nearly crushed when The Male Half closed The Female Half’s father’s Cadillac trunk lid on it. Yee-owch!)

The Hidden House’s Wednesday night Comedy On Tap open mic night is a rollicking affair and the tiny room is often packed. (We would have provided you with photos, but our camera’s rechargeables had some sort of stroke.)

We thank the boys at H.H.– Steve, Myke, Kirk, Sean, Stu, et al– for making us feel welcome. (And, they said, we should tell anyone that is passing through PHX to stop on their Wednesday night sorieé and they’ll feel just as welcome.)

Click here for the Hidden House MySpace profile.

We’re headed to Los Angeles. We’re flying in Thursday afternoon. We’re not sure what we’ll be up to. (The Male Half has a set at the Comedy & Magic Club in Hermosa Beach on Friday night and two more there on Saturday night. Outside of that, we’ll be improvising.)

Can’t recall if the C&MC has a hangout room… Otherwise, we’d exhort all to converge there. Hope to see people during our visit to the Southland!

Send us an email… or a message via Facebook… or a message through MySpace!

Ugh! Sounds vaguely dicey.

Although the recent “miracle” on the Hudson gives us great comfort, The Male Half is wigged when anticipating an airplane ride. The Female Half is positively placid, even during violent turbulence or “bumpy air” as the veteran flyboys call it.)

So it helps to have all the data. Click here to see a swingin’, animated map of the U.S. that shows which areas of the country the pilot will be required to observe Visual Flight Rules, Marginal Visual Flight Rules, Instrument Flight Rules or Low (or Limited) Instrument Flight Rules. And it’s in real time almost!

(Click on the “Aviation” tab to check out the “Upper Air Observations” are at various altitudes– a good indicator of whether your flight will be smooth or bumpy… or maybe it’s best just to fly ignorant!)

In the space of 5:40, we’ll go from the sleet, snow and ice pellets of the NE U.S. to the 61 degrees and 21 per cent relative humidity of the Phoenix desert.

It’s in Memphis… we did it last year, in February. It was a nice venue, great crowds (when there wasn’t the threat of an ice storm. Thank you very much, local TV weatherdouchebags!) and good food. Owners Sammy Martin and John Marks ran the room based on the format that was developed by the folks who ran Comedy TX.

We heard a rumor that it was closing. We called. Sammy Martin answered and confirmed that it will remain open through the last weekend of February.

The future is uncertain. Martin said that he and Marks my try to produce one-off comedy shows at other venues in Memphis. Stay tuned.

“I guess, when Obama says this stuff, I don’t think he really means it… and that’s what gives me hope.”

Odd part is, Stewart’s audience is laughing and cheering. A reversal from their reactions during the campaign. Maybe it’s easier to make Obama jokes than he thought.

Try this free test.

We found out our download is 741 Kbps and our upload is 133 Kbps.

From the Broadband Report:

As of June 2008, 96.47 per cent of US workers connected to the Internet with broadband, up 0.52 percentage points from the 95.95 per cent share in May. At work, 3.53 per cent connect at 56Kbps or less.

We suspect the folks who connect at work at the pokey 56 Kbps speed do so because broadband isn’t necessary– All they need it for is email or other low-bandwidth apps.

Also:

US broadband penetration broke ninety percent among active Internet users in June 2008. Broadband jumped to 90.5% in June, up 0.53 percentage points over the previous month.

Nielsen Online defines an “active internet user” as one who has logged onto the internet in the last 30 days. They estimate there are 151 million aiu’s in the U.S.

And, again from the Broadband Report, news of a significant move by the FCC:

The FCC has approved the regulated use of the “white spaces” between and among the unused analog TV channels, for unlicensed devices. With the transition to digital television by February 2009, the soon to be empty analog channels can be used for other purposes. Some estimate that wireless providers could use the lower frequency TV spectrum to provide universal broadband access for every household in America for as little as $10 per month (Calabrese and Scott 2006).

FCC head Kevin Martin said that the approval of rules authorizing the use of TV white spaces spectrum “is a significant victory for consumers… Opening the white spaces will allow for the creation of a WiFi on steroids.”

We’ve taken the Twitter plunge. We’re not sure why… but we’ll “tweet” on occasion and we exhort all you readers to “follow” us, via Twitter. (There… we think we have the terminology down.)

We’ve configured our cell to tweet. Maybe we’ll tweet a bit during our upcoming trek to Phoenix and Los Angeles.

To follow us, go to http://twitter.com/sheckymagazine (and dig those crazy test-tweets)!

From the Miami Herald comes this, on the occasion of that town playing host to the South Beach Comedy Festival:

Admit it. When you hear the words “comedy festival” you think stand-up comedy.

And that’s OK. Over the years, your assumption would have been right.

But since change is the theme of the day, it should come as no surprise that the fourth annual South Beach Comedy Festival, which runs through Saturday, is breaking tradition in terms of how it presents the funny.

Anyone else feel a chill go up the spine upon reading the introductory clause in paragraph three?

Change? The theme of the day? What kind of change do you have in mind?

There’s a clue in this, from Fest Director Raul Mateo:

“There will be traditional stand-up comics. They will probably always make up a majority of the acts,” says Raul Mateo, festival director. “But this year we have people who are not traditional comedians doing shows. We have comedy theater from a well-known playwright. We have variety shows. And we have shows in Spanish to be more inclusive with the Spanish-speaking community.

Now go back and read the part that’s in bold using Eeyore’s voice.

Translation: I guess we’ll always be stuck with standup comics.

Every festival director for the past six or seven years has said this or a variation of this.

So, admit it: When you hear the words “comedy festival,” you think standup comedy. Well, shame on you.

The Gothamist interviewed FOS Paul F. Tompkins on the occasion of his move to New York.

Tompkins is in the big city because he’s the host of Best Week Ever, the pop culture and entertainment snarkfest on cable outlet Video Hits 1. (Do they even call it that any more? Probably not, as they don’t even bother with music videos any more… do they?)

On the topic of Best Week Ever and the “backlash”:

People have been very dismissive of it even when talking to me. “Oh you’re on ‘I Love the Whatevers.'” It’s like no, it’s not ‘I Love the Whatevers.’ It’s a specific show and it’s called Best Week Ever and it’s not just, “Hey remember the Rubik’s Cube?…Yes, now moving on to the next thing.” I think that’s why our show lasted throughout the different changes in VH-1 programming. By having to talk about what happened in the week, it gave our show more substance than just nostalgia. Because it was things that just happened, people got a bigger charge out of it.

And now there are still people that are snobby about the show. There are people that assume that I am embarrassed about the show or am just doing it for a paycheck, like it’s inconceivable to them that I would actually be proud of the show and that I would really enjoy doing it. Which I do and which I am. So people can say whatever they want.

When asked if shows like his are irrelevant or redundant, now that everyone has the ability to broadcast their own snark via Twitter or Facebook, he responds:

In a world where everybody has the ability to comment in a public forum (i.e. the internet) on things that are happening in the world, we’re trying to say, “But here’s what happens when people get paid to do it. It’s maybe a little funnier.

Read the whole thing– especially his reply to “Does there come a point where you stop waiting for your big break?”

From a phoner, recounted on TCPalm.com:

With 22 chart-topping singles, six platinum albums, a beautiful actress wife and a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, what else could Clint Black possibly want?

The country music icon answered that question last spring with an appearance on CBS’ “Secret Talents of the Stars,” trying his hand at standup comedy.

“I had to write my own jokes, and go work out in comedy clubs in Nashville and L.A., to try to come up with two minutes of ‘A’ material,” Black said in a phone interview. “It wasn’t easy; I was wishing I could use somebody elses jokes.”

“No Line On The Horizon” is the title of the new U2 CD. (Why do we care? Really. Why do we care? We’re not big U2 fans here at SHECKYmagazine.com HQ. The Male Half saw them live at the Tower, probably at a show to support the release of “War,” but he hasn’t cared a whit about them since.)

We care because of the title of track 7:

1. “No Line On The Horizon”
2. “Magnificent”
3. “Moment of Surrender”
4. “Unknown Caller”
5. “I’lll Go Crazy If I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight”
6. “Get On Your Boots”
7. “Stand Up Comedy”
8. “Fez– Being Born”
9. “White As Snow”
10. “Breathe”
11. “Cedars Of Lebanon”

For a few days we were fearful that the CD would be called Stand Up Comedy– Oh, what havoc that would cause with folks searching for decent information on the WWW relating to standup comedy! Trust us, anything U2-related would swamp anything else on the web. It’s the demographic.

Perhaps that’s why they named their last CD “How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb.” Perhaps they wanted to suppress information about nuclear devices and the people who might stop them from detonating.

Which group is capable of doing the most damage to the business of live standup comedy?

The comedians?

The club owners?

We’d have to say the owners. For it is they who determine whether or not the comedian ever gets onto the comedy club’s stage. (Hold any emails that argue that it is the club’s booker or manager that determines such things– the booker or manager serves at the pleasure of the owner, so it all goes back to him/her.)

Please note that we say, “doing the most damage”– for even though a club owner has the ultimate say in who gets on his stage, the comedian can and does share some of the responsibility.

There is a general feeling in the land that this nation is facing hard economic times (although, judging from the dense traffic around the Deptford Mall this past Saturday, the misery has yet to hit Southern New Jersey!), and that comedy club proprietors will soon be forced to take stern measures to ensure their club’s viability.

What’s the first way to save big bucks? Cut back on the budget for talent!

(We’ve seen this tactic employed in prosperous times… what makes anyone think that some owners won’t try it now?!)

Where’s the most likely place to start saving money when it comes to talent?

If you answered “the emcee spot!” you are correct. (And you are probably an emcee!)

Where’s the worst place to start saving money when it comes to talent?

If you answered “the emcee spot!” you are also correct. (And you are probably a headliner who has just suffered through a weekend of shows with a horrendous emcee… or you are an audience member who endured a show hosted by someone who should not even be allowed to park cars, let alone hop onto a weekend stage to host a professional show.)

How many times have we heard (before the show even starts), “The opening act always sucks!”? This has become a truism among many a comedy fan. Of course, it’s not true. But the public has “caught on” to the set of ideas that the emcee is paid poorly, is the least experienced act on the bill and, therefore, is most often the person on the bill who is least likely to actually make people laugh, keep the show moving and avoid embarrassing moments.

The folks who book the emcees bear some of the responsibility for the popularity of this concept. For although the emcee spot is one of the most important on the bill, it is quite often one of the most neglected.

So, when people start cutting corners, they follow this disastrous formula: Take an open-miker (who only has five minutes) and make him an emcee (which requires him to do fifteen minutes). Then take a comic who was formerly an emcee (and might have twenty minutes if he’s lucky) and bump him up to feature act and have him do thirty.

The result of such cost-cutting is that a paying, weekend crowd will suffer through not one, but two acts who are in over their heads. By the time the headliner has hit the stage, they’ve sat through an excruciating 45 minutes.

And all because, in an effort to keep expenses down, you’ve figured out a way to pay the emcees nothing and a way to pay the features what you formerly paid to the emcees.

Congratulations! You’ve hit upon a formula that will result in complaints, cancellations, terrible word-of-mouth and, inevitably, empty seats.

At the same time, comics bear some of the responsibility for this train wreck. Early on we all need to take certain risks and “move up to the next level.” But, we all need to be acutely aware of exactly what we’re capable of doing. We must be aware of, but certainly not slaves to, our limitations. If you’ve only ever done seven minutes, don’t agree to do 15. (How many times have we had an open-miker look us straight in the eyes and say, “I have two hours of material in my notebook.”? No. You. Don’t. You know who has two hours of material in his notebook? Brian Regan. The list pretty much ends there.)

Is there a solution to this standoff? There are a few. Not the least of which is a more hands-on approach to the open mike night. (If the club even has one.)

If a club’s manager or booker or owner even has to ask a local comic “How much time do you have?” then he is probably not paying sufficient attention to his local talent. (And he probably deserves to be lied to!)

The open mike, staged and used properly, is the lifeblood of any comedy club when it comes to a constant supply of competent comics who can host a show, get the intros right and not offend anyone. Clubs that don’t even have an open mike night are going to have a rough time finding talent for that important opening slot. And are probably going to end up paying more for that position.

The person responsible for talent should pay close attention to the weekend shows as well. Too many club managers or owners don’t even watch the shows. If you’ve got an emcee who is agitating for a feature spot, watching him over the course of two shows can pretty much tell you all you need to know. If you really want to be certain of his skills, have the emcee do two different shows one night. If he melts down and reverts back to safe mode, he’s probably not ready.

It’s quite the feat to book those first two spots on a show. If a club owner thinks he can solve his problems by bumping an emcee up to the feature spot and grab a random open miker to host the weekend, he’s got big problems.

(And if you think that paying your headliner $10,000 will make the audience forget those excruciating first 45 minutes, you are mistaken.)

Here‘s an item from the website of Extra (that’s the ghastly product placement orgy produced by Warner Bros.) that says that John Mayer is going to host a variety show on CBS.

Back in June of 2006, we commented on Mayer’s dabbling in standup:

We actually do think that, of all the H-wood standup dabbler types, Mayer could could actually make a go of the standup thing. We stumbled upon his VH-1 show (John Mayer Has A TV Show) a couple times and found it to be wildly funny. Mayer was likeable and seemed to possess a genuine sense of humor and the tools with which to effectively wield it. A master of self-effacement, seeming to be at times embarassed/amused by the degree to which his fans adored him.

FOS Sharilyn Johnson has a lengthier and more timely post on the subject at her blog, From The Back Of The Room.

The long-running rumors that John Mayer would host a new variety show were confirmed by CBS last week, and immediately, venom spewed throughout the internet. He’s a sell-out, he’s a douchebag, he needs to stick to music, and so on. In short: “that’s enough, John Mayer.”

I disagree. Walk with me…

Walk with her here.

Fortunately, though, Whitney Matheson (the blogger behind USAToday’s Pop Candy), remembers such things. And on Tuesday, she reminded her readers of the flamboyant prop comic’s birthday with this posting. We excerpt it here:

I’m not sure when I first witnessed Rip Taylor’s crazed, pun-filled confetti act, but I know I was pretty young, and I also know that I found it absolutely hilarious. At 75, the comedian still works and maintains a website, where he often posts updates for fans. The notes are charming and personal, and reading them makes me feel like I know the guy. (He should think about getting a Twitter account.)

That Rip Taylor website is here and it is bookmarkable if only for its frequent and extravagant name-dropping– Did someone say Ruta Lee? Who else would (or could?) mention Chita Rivera and Green Day in the same website?!

Here’s a piece of a letter to the editor of the Lehigh Valley (PA) Express-Times that ran in today’s edition, from comedian Alex House:

After witnessing the performance by the five top comedians, I hope those who attended got a little dose of reality when they realized that the winner of this last season, Iliza Shlesinger, was not in fact the funniest or strongest comedian of the show.

It gets better.

The Female Half got an email from a fellow comic who saw the LCS road show in another venue. He said that, he hoped she wouldn’t take this the wrong way, but he didn’t think Shlesinger was funny.

It’s that preface– “I hope you don’t take this the wrong way…”– that is a pre-emptive strike, a warning that the recipient shouldn’t be offended by what’s to follow. He’s making it clear that he’s not going to judge all female comedians by the performance of one. And in so doing, he’s allowing for the possibility that The Female Half will think he might be capable of doing so.

Of course, the Female Half takes no such umbrage.

But it’s safe to say that had one of our readers written to the Male Half to say that he found the performance of Jeff Dye or Jim Tavare to be subpar, he wouldn’t have dreamed of prefacing his remarks with, “I hope you don’t take this the wrong way…”

White male comics do not face the same prejudices as female comics or minority comics (of either gender). Female (and minority) comics are conditioned to expect such prejudices. People who address female and minority comics with critiques are conditioned to preface their comments with various disclaimers. We’re all conditioned, it seems.

When we saw Shlesinger win, we feared that she would not be ready. We had no doubt that, with time and hard work, she’d represent the show (and comedians in general and, if you insist, female comedians specifically) ably. However, it is very difficult to headline a show following four or five other comedians who have far more performing experience under their belts. It seems our worst fears have been realized.

Turns out that the show has done a disservice to Shlesinger, to all comics and perhaps to female comics. Should any of us be surprised?

On August 8, 2008, we wrote:

But getting back to McHale’s Standup Soup presentation– he quite vividly demonstrated the show’s inexplicable lack of a sense of humor. And when he showed the montage of Shlesinger clad variously in her underwear and a bikini, he threw another shovel of dirt on the show’s credibility.

Indeed, after seeing that montage, Shlesinger herself should be embarassed. Regardless of whether or not she won, she will, for the foreseeable future, mount the stage with the knowledge that a significant number of her votes were motivated not by a genuine fondness for her humor but by a momentary and primal lust for her body parts.

You do what you gotta to win. But, for those folks who are prone to extrapolate and try to determine the larger socio-cultural implications of Shlesinger’s victory (Bellamy himself was quick to bellow about her being the show’s first female winner), it’s a sorry moment.

Sure, she showed a certain minimal level of “toughness” in fending off the challenges (if you want to call it that), but we will always wonder (as will the general public) what the outcome would have been had she not colluded with the show’s producers to engineer the cheesecake clips in the house segment of the show.

Does anyone know of any sites that host audio files for free? (And don’t arbitrarily take those files down at an unspecified time, without telling the person who uploaded the file, thereby leaving the person who uploaded the file without the ability to provide clients with an audio clip?)

We had a couple audio files on our Electronic Press Kit (convenient for radio stations who want to promote our upcoming engagements), but the goofballs at (Website we’d rather not give any publicity to) took them down sometime in the past few weeks/months and didn’t bother to tell us!

We Googled “free audio file hosting,” and got the creepiest, sorriest bunch of broken links and busted ventures we’ve ever seen.

Does anyone out there host audio files for free and do so reliably? All we need is a site that offers to let us park our (relatively small) audio files on their site and link to them so that folks who visit our site can download the files to use in a radio broadcast, radio commercial or whatever.

We’d appreciate any assistance on this. Thanks in advance.

Frazier Moore, writing for Associated Press, kicks off his summary of the PBS series, “Make ’em Laugh, The Funny Business of America” (which debuts tomorrow night), with a pretty good insight.

The funniest people don’t take no for an answer — at least, they don’t without a fight for their audience’s yuks. Their policy has never been “invite ’em to laugh.” It’s “make ’em.”

This never-say-die zeal (and the laughter that results) is the unifying spirit of “Make ‘Em Laugh: The Funny Business of America,” PBS’ six-hour, century-spanning showcase of the nation’s leading laugh-getters.

Hosted by Billy Crystal and narrated by Amy Sedaris, the series blends history with performance and taps the expertise of more than 90 comedians, writers, producers and comic scholars.

We were totally unaware of this series. (Hey! Who is running the p.r. department at PBS? How about a press release or two?) We were watching… something, can’t remember what… on PBS a coupla weeks ago and we saw the promo starring Billy Crystal. We forgot about it and then a couple of sharp-eyed readers reminded us. (One of ’em saw the book in a bookstore– Ya gotta love that synergy!)

Moore (who we trashed in a previous posting when he bobbled an analysis of Jon Stewart’s Oscar hosting stint in ’06) may have redeemed himself with that simple observation. We hope it was his and not lifted from the intro to Episode One, which is described thusly:

Kicking off at 8 p.m. Wednesday (check local listings), the series asks, “Would Ya Hit a Guy With Glasses?” as it celebrates comedy’s nerds, jerks and oddballs. The outsider has always been a source of amusement, the series observes. Examples range from bookish Harold Lloyd of silent films through Phyllis Diller and Steve Martin to the goof ball heroes of Judd Apatow comedies.

Stay tuned. We’ll try to view it live or at least tape it and view it later.

We don’t expect to like all of it… or relate to it– one of the episodes devotes some time to the Three Stooges. (We’re having trouble appreciating the Stooges on even an intellectual level these days.)

Check your local listings for airing time. Check out PBS’s page on the whole affair. Jim Lehrer on Comedy? Huh? Wha?!